Kids Love the Crumpled Paper or Wrinkled Heart Activity to Stop Bullying
The wrinkled heart activity or crumpled paper bullying lesson is a powerful way to teach children about the lasting effects of bullying.
This simple activity is a valuable friendship lesson that shows students how difficult it is to undo the damage from unkind words and actions!
Who could imagine that a single sheet of scrunched up paper could be so effective in demonstrating the devastating impact thoughtless words and actions can have on people?
The crumpled heart activity is a powerful low-prep friendship activity for teachers. It's quick and easy as it just requires some paper or a paper heart (get one here). It's a big hit with elementary and middle school students as an engaging demonstration that can have a long-lasting effect, but I will offer a word of caution.
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When using this activity, students often become excited when they stomp on the paper because it requires them to be active and it's fun. However, teachers should be careful to rein in the excitement and have students focus on the message. This activity should not be turned into a fun game instead of the powerful life lesson it's intended to be.
If you're looking for bullying activities for kids to improve friendships in your classroom, this lesson is a must to add to your social-emotional learning toolbox. It helps to improve student mental health and wellness which naturally leads to a more positive and inclusive classroom community while reducing stress and anxiety for greater teacher wellbeing.
I believe this bullying experiment was originally used by a teacher in New York who used scrunched up paper to show her students the lasting impact cruel or nasty behavior can have.
When I used the wrinkled heart activity during an assembly at a school, it was obvious it had quite an impact. I substituted a plain piece of paper for a red paper heart for younger students and a cut-out of a person for older students.
I have included instructions for my version below along with a link to print the wrinkled heart lesson template mentioned above.
If you're working with high school students, use the crumpled paper bullying lesson as shown in the video below by Tony Brent.
The Crumpled Heart Activity
This bullying activity is an immensely powerful way to deal with bad behavior in a group or grade. It can really help a bully to understand just how hurtful their words and actions can be and the lasting impact it can have on someone's mental health and self-esteem.
Instructions for The Crumpled Heart Activity
- 1Download and print the heart template onto red paper. You'll need one for each student. If you don't want to cut them all out yourself, have your students help by cutting their own.
- 2Ask children to look at how beautiful and perfect their heart is. Ask them to imagine this is their own, real heart. They're going to give swap hearts with the person standing beside them. Ask this person to love and care for their heart as if it was their own.
- 3Instruct students to say mean things to the heart they were given. Crumple it up into a tight little ball, throw it on the ground, and stomp on it. There should be a lot of laughter about now which is fine but center students again by reminding them how hurtful it is to be the person receiving an insult.
- 4Have students pick up the little crumpled ball, look at the student who owns the heart, and say they're sorry. Turn their attention back to the crumpled ball and apologize. Say they didn't mean to be so thoughtless; they didn't know what came over them and could they please forgive them? While apologizing, carefully uncrumple the paper heart. Place it on a table and try to smooth it out.
- 5Students now return the hearts to their owners. Have each person hold up their crumpled heart and ask them how it looks. Does it still look as beautiful as it was before they gave it away? Did the person they gave it to care for it? How do they feel about the person who didn't take care of their heart?
- 6Explain that every time a person hurls abuse, belittles, talks behind someone's back, bullies, writes unkind things on social media, etc., they are responsible for adding a wrinkle to that person's heart.
- 7Even though they may apologize later, that wrinkle cannot be smoothed out. Sure, it may fade over time, but that person's heart will never really be the same and the scars can remain for a lifetime.
- 8Take the opportunity to talk about the responsibility we all have to care for other people and their feelings. Explain that being unkind has a lasting effect on the hearts and minds of the people they are mean to. It changes the way people feel about them and can give them a bad reputation.
If taught well, this activity can be highly effective. But again, I want to caution teachers to be mindful of the serious nature of the crumpled heart activity. I was told that in one class, some students thought it was okay to repeat mean things they'd heard others say during the activity. They told their parents it was okay because it was just a game.
If you do not believe your students are mature enough to understand the lesson the activity delivers, please do not use it.
If you've used the crumpled paper activity, I'd love to hear about your experience. Please get in touch and let me know how successful it was!
NOTE: If you enjoyed this paper crumpling activity, I'm sure your students will love the Snowball Toss Activity. This activity is a great way for students to blow off some steam and let go of any minor worries they may have. Many teachers have found it to be very effective.
Updated: 5 March, 2024
â–º A Whole Year of Engaging Kindness Activities
